This will be the first Lenten season I observe in over 10 years, and surely the first time I participate with understanding and purpose! For this season, I am giving up eating out, which includes fast food. While this is a particularly difficult thing for me to do as a chicken nugget connoisseur, I chose to give up this habit because I think it directly ties into my impatience. This year, I want to go beyond giving up something I like and instead focus on what God is giving me, what he is inviting me to change in my life for His glory.
I’m in a season of waiting right now, and I haven’t be patient for any of it. Since we lost Omie, I’ve been waiting – first waiting for him to come home to us (cremation takes too long, in my humble opinion), waiting to get back to school, waiting to be cleared to exercise, waiting for diagnostic tests, waiting for consults, waiting for procedures, waiting waiting waiting for all the things we need to do before we can conceive another precious little one. I’ve been waiting to move and waiting to graduate and waiting to get married. And I hate waiting. But I’ve realized that everything will happen, must happen, in God’s time – not mine.
I will have to wait and wait and wait some more before this is all said and done with. I can either wait with patience and grace, or I can wait in anxiety and stress and discomfort. I’m doing my best to choose the former.
What does this have to do with giving up Chick-fil-a and other delicious food for six and a half weeks? I eat out a lot because I’m impatient – I don’t want to take the time to cook or wait for Jason to cook. I don’t want to bother myself with meal prepping or considering my eating schedule ahead of time. So I’m giving up this one habit in hopes that I can develop my patience.
I want to take this special season before Easter to truly reflect on how I can change my habits & my heart to be closer to Jesus, to learn to put my trust in Him alone, to know that His timing is perfect and that this season of waiting is important. I’m using this process of “giving up” something to receive God’s gift to me, His invitation to change for the better. I hope everyone has a wonderful, reflective Lenten season!